Forged in Fire
by FogOnTheBeach
Summary: The next prophet after Kevin is shocked when she finds out that the only one who can reopen Heaven is a child between a prophet and an angel. Sam and Dean have just the angel in mind.
1. Chapter 1

I plopped my feet on the desk and leaned back in my chair. I had a diet coke in one hand and a barrel of popcorn between my knees. I found some old Audrey Hepburn movie that I hadn't seen on Netflix. There wasn't much to do in the bunker, so I spent most of my time watching movies and exploring the place. Sam and Dean had mentioned something about a tablet that the prophet before me spent most of his time deciphering, but that seemed to be out of the picture now. I frowned a little to think of Kevin, who I had only met once, but who they both spoke fondly of. I was pretty sure the general response to his death was supposed to be sadness, but in my case it was more along the lines of 'fucking terrified'.

I remembered what happened to Krista when all the prophets were captured by Crowley. I'd never seen anyone die before, much less murdered in cold blood. Worse than that, that had been my first experience with the supernatural. Before that I'd never had any clue that any of this existed outside stories. I still had regular night terrors about the whole situation. Sam and Dean regularly came running into my room in the middle of the night to comfort me when I woke up screaming. They were usually very comforting presences. I knew, of course, that when it came to Abaddon, Metatron, Crowley, etc. that they couldn't ever completely protect me, but I always felt at least marginally safer around them.

Kevin had done with so much courage, at least that's what I was always told. Only wonderful things about Kevin. Kevin who was such an incredible help to everyone, while I sat in the bunker watching Netflix. Never in my life had I felt so useless and also so terrified. I used to think of myself as a brave person. I craved adventure and freedom, but when it came down to it, I was far more cowardly than the people around me.

As far as Sam and Dean told me, Metatron thought he had flipped a switch in Heaven to keep any new prophets from being 'activated' or whatever. Apparently Castiel had found a way to reverse that without anyone knowing. It was all _way _too complicated for me to follow, but the one thing I did gather was that as long as I stayed in the bunker I was safe. I was sure they told the exact same thing to Kevin.

The door to the bunker swung open and I jumped a little. My hand instinctively flinched toward the gun on the table. Dean had taught me a bit about how to fire it, but my aim was shit and I kept hurting my shoulder. I relaxed a bit when I saw three familiar faces come staggering through the door.

"Hey-o." I said casually, returning to my movie. Over the past few weeks I had immediately bonded with Dean, who had treated me more or less like a little sister, probably because I needed it. It might also have had something to do with how often I baked for the two of them. Sam and I had also become quite close, but I couldn't but find him just a bit more intimidating than his brother.

"Hello, Margaret." Castiel said. I looked up at him and smiled a bit awkwardly. I didn't know Cas very well. We had only met once and even then he had not spoken a great deal or made much eye contact with me, but Sam and Dean talked about him like a third brother. He was busy building an army or something. It struck me as unusual for him to talk to me so directly. As soon as I met his face he looked away to the side and didn't say anything else.

"Hey, um, Maggie can we talk to you for a second?" Sam said. He was very clearly uncomfortable with the topic he was broaching. My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach. That sentence screamed that something horrible had happened. Immediately my mind raced, coming up with a million possible horrific events that could have occurred. My brother had been killed, my mom kidnapped, my dad tortured. My face must have shown my horror, because Dean immediately shot Sam a glare.

"Geez, Sam don't freak her out. Everyone's okay, Mags." I talked about my family often to the boys, so Dean caught where my mind was headed right away. We were all extremely close, especially my kid brother and I. I always related to Dean when it came to how protective he was of Sam and I often envied the fact that they were able to stay together, while I hadn't seen my brother in what felt like ages. However, they had both insisted that my family was better off having nothing to do with me, and that they were surrounded by hunters they trusted. I let out a breath of air, relieved but they were clearly dancing around something.

"Okaaay… So, what is it?" I asked, wishing I didn't have to hear the answer.

"Let's go into the living room." Dean said, seriously. I stared at him, trying to figure out exactly what was going on in his head, but none of them would meet my eyes.

"Okay." I nearly whispered. My stomach turned and I felt like I was going to throw up. I didn't have anywhere near the energy to demand that they let me know what was going on immediately. Had I done something wrong? Were they throwing me out? What could I have done? I didn't do _anything_. Maybe that was the problem. Maybe I wasn't as useful as Kevin so they couldn't waste time and recourses taking care of me. They were going to put me out and then Crowley would find me and cut off all my fingers. I tried to take a deep breath like Sam had taught me, but it came out shaky and shallow. All I could do was follow them into the living room.

When we reached the living room, I sat down in a big plush chair and the others filed in after me, Castiel taking the farthest seat away from me and doing everything he could not to meet my eyes. He had something to do with this, I was sure. Otherwise he wouldn't even be here. I found myself glaring at him subconsciously. I kept telling myself to relax, that Sam and Dean would never let anything happen to me, but that was getting more and more difficult to believe.

When everyone had sat down, I nearly shouted, "What's going on, guys?" I did not handle suspense well.

"Well, we've got a little bit of a problem," Sam tried to say as gently as possible.

"What?" I demanded, cutting him off.

"Well… Um, you know how we told you about Nephilim?"

"Um yeah… Super major powered half angels half humans, right?"

"Yeah, and how there used to be a lot of them but there aren't anymore." I nodded, remembering. Castiel had killed the last one. "Well, when Dean and I went to see Garth, he had made some… interesting new connections and they let him in on some really… interesting information about a certain kind of Nephilim. This creature could, hypothetically, open or close Heaven and Hell." I looked from Sam to Dean excitedly.

"Wha… That's amazing! That's sort of perfect, right?"

"Right…" Same continued slowly, "But like I said, there aren't any left, and there hasn't even… ever… actually _been_ a Nephilim like this." My face fell. What was he going on about and how did any of this have anything to do with me?

"Sam, you aren't making _any _sense."

"It's gotta be the kid of a prophet and an angel, Maggie." Dean took over. That's when it clicked. My jaw fell open and I stared, wide-eyed at Dean. That was why Castiel was there. That's why they needed me. _They wanted me to have his baby!_ I floundered for words, probably sounding like a complete idiot. In the corner, Cas had turned a bright shade of red, still staring at his feet.

"What?" I demanded, though it was clear that I understood. I got up out of my chair and walked behind it. I hysterically looked for something to do with my hands. I settled for picking at the fabric of the chair intensely.

"I know it's asking a lot…" Sam said, trying to ease the blow.

"Wait, just hold on a second." I hissed moving on to the other side of the room. My arms holding on to my hair dramatically. "Um… Um… I don't think I can listen to this." I covered my face with my hands and shook my head as I paced quickly across the room. Any thoughts of breathing slowly and composing myself flew out the window. "You're… You're trying to tell me that you want me to have a child."

"Specifically, my child." Castiel chimed in for the first time. I stopped pacing.

"_Thank you._" I hissed in his direction. As if I didn't understand, I wasn't stupid. There were other angels, but none of them that Sam and Dean trusted.

"No. No." I said hastily, my hands returning to my hair, "I'm sorry. There has to be another way. You have to find another way. I'm not going to be your sacrificial lamb, Mary Magdalene type person."

"Actually, Mary Magdalene was a prostitute that…" Castiel said.

"Well I'm not being that either! You'll have to find someone else to pimp out to your angel buddy." I said. There was a long silence in the room and I crossed my arms over my chest. I suddenly felt extremely exposed. I thought about how if this were any other job I could totally sue all of their asses for sexual harassment. I knew that there was only one active prophet at a time, it could only be me, but I wasn't anywhere near ready to admit that to myself. When no one said anything in response to my outburst, I continued. "You two are the kings of loopholes. Find one! This is completely ridiculous. I'm nineteen! Being a teenage mother wasn't exactly part of my life plan!" Dean didn't even seem to want to look at me. I knew he was beginning to think of me as a second younger sibling. This whole conversation was clearly making him uncomfortable.

Finally Sam spoke up again. "We've all had to make compromises, Maggie. I mean, Dean and I have _died_ more than few ti…"

"Shut up." I said, waving my arm in his direction. I turned on Castiel, "And _you_." His eyes shot up from where they had been firmly engrossed with his shoelaces, "What do you have to say about this?" Castiel looked from Dean to Sam for help but neither of them offered any.

"I…" He swallowed, "I am not entirely inexperienced when it comes to raising children." He paused and amended his statement with, "I have raised an army of angels. Also I have experienced sexual intercourse before…"

"Cas!" Dean barked.

"I can't believe I'm listening to this." I exclaimed.

"I know it isn't ideal," Sam started in again and I cut him off.

"I really don't want to hear you talk right now." Sam ran a hand through his hair and gave a 'fine, whatever' gesture.

"Look, Mags, we don't like this anymore than you do, but it comes down to this or the end of the world. It sucks. Big time. But there isn't another option."

I wanted to crawl out of my skin. This was not supposed to happen. I was supposed to graduate art school and travel around Europe from museum to museum. I was going to sleep in my car and do odd jobs for a living and collect stories to talk about on Facebook. I was going to write a book and be really poor until it got published and I made a million dollars in royalties. I was going to die with a ton of cats in some foreign land surrounded by interesting people. I hadn't thought about those dreams in a while, since I'd been swept off to the bunker, but suddenly they all came swarming back into my mind. I wouldn't be able to do any of that with a baby. Unless Castiel wanted full custody of it. Was that even a thing for angels? I wouldn't want that either. Worse! What if Castiel killed it after it had reopened Heaven like hie had with the last Nephilim? My head ached with all the horrible possibilities and I found that I had to sit down or I was going to fall over.

"And if I did agree to this, which I'm _not,_ would you kill it like the last one?" I shot at Castiel. He didn't seem to enjoy being put on the spot.

Hesitating for a long time, he finally said, "No. Killing Jane was something I did when I was in a… bad place. Metatron… manipulated me."

"And you're not in a 'bad place' anymore?" I nearly spat at him.

"No." Castiel's voice lowered, suddenly extremely sure of himself. He looked like he would like to dig a hole into me with his eyes. "I would never let anything happen to our child." I just stared at him for a moment, a bit stunned by his intensity. Finally I shook myself out of it and covered my face with my hands again.

"This is insane…" I mumbled under my breath.

"Look," Sam said cautiously, "Why don't you and Cas talk alone for a little? You can have some time to think about it, but this needs to happen soon." Sam glanced at Dean and got up to leave. Dean gave me a quick pat on the back as he followed his brother out of the room.

I stared at my hands, pressed up against my eyes for what felt like a long time. Castiel didn't make any move to speak or approach me, which I was grateful for. My head was still spinning. The pain of childbirth, the rest of my life tied to a super powerful baby, having sex for the first time with someone I had now only met twice. My virginity wasn't something I usually went around talking about. Nineteen didn't seem that old to have not had sex, but it often brought up a lot of uncomfortable talking about uncomfortable things. I could admit to being a bit squeamish about the subject. I was brought up in Catholic school and we had it drummed into out heads pretty severely that sex wasn't something to mess around with. So even at nineteen, I'd subconsciously avoided it with my past significant others. It was something I was planning on getting around to at some point, but in my mind it had always been with someone I loved and trusted. Not a near-complete stranger who I was being forced to have a child with in order to save the world.

"Margaret?" Cas asked solemnly.

"What?!" I had hoped he wouldn't say anything until I had time to get my emotions under control, but already my chin was shaking and my upper lip wavering. I could feel tears pooling up. Talking wasn't going to help.

"I am sorry." He sounded so genuine and I suddenly felt horrible for having shaped at him earlier.

"No, don't be sorry, it's not your fault." I said shaking my head. I was clearly crying by that point. This was all so unfair and humiliating. I _hated_ crying in front of people. "I'm just… I can't believe… I don't know. This isn't fair! It's not fair!" I knew I sounded like a five year old throwing a tantrum but I didn't care. A sob caught in my throat and I thought about how pathetic I must look. Castiel shifted in his chair, clearly trying to think of something to say to comfort me.

"Um. Please don't… cry, Margaret." His monotonal, husky voice combined with his honest attempt to sound concerned was almost comical.

"I'll cry if I damn well want to!" I shouted. "Dammit! I'm sorry, Castiel. You must be just as freaked out as I am."

"I'll admit that making a child with a human does not fall in line with my plans." I chuckled a little through tears. "However, I didn't… cry quite as much as you." I smiled in spite of myself. His voice was so honest, and even under such awful circumstances, it was funny to see him so flustered over seeing me cry. I shook my head and wiped away the tears. I was overcome with a desire not to make him as uncomfortable as I was. I stood up. I was so much more comfortable when I was moving. I always had been. I took a few successful deep breaths and was able to calm myself down a little.

"I guess I don't have much of a choice, huh?" I mused quietly.

"Margaret, if you are implying that I would force myself on you without your conse…"

"No, no, no. No, of course not." I interrupted him, shaking my head. I fiddled with the table cloth on the coffee table. "I just… I don't know. I'm upset. I barely know you. I mean, Sam and Dean talk about you all the time. I'm sure you're wonderful and you're certainly very handsome. I'm sorry that was weird. Your vessel is very handsome. I don't know what I'm saying." I sat back down and shoved my face in a chair pillow. Cas was silent for a while, just staring at me. It was extremely awkward and the tears were starting again. Finally I exclaimed, "Please, say something!"

Castiel slowly got to his feet and crossed the room to where I sat. He sat down in the chair next to me and carefully took my hands in his. I peered out nervously over the pillow into his piercing blue eyes. His hands were warm, calloused, and twice the size of mine. There was something about him that felt safe and stable, especially when I felt like such a hurricane inside. Holding his hands, I felt more taken care of than I had since his whole thing started.

"Don't worry. You're going to be alright. I won't let anything happen to you." I sniffled.

"You're being so nice to me." I said with a small awkward chuckle.

"I don't want you to be afraid." More than anything I wanted to rest my head on his shoulder and let him wrap his arms around me. I couldn't remember ever having felt so strongly about a person so quickly. It didn't make the situation any better, but I felt more sturdy than before with his hands around mine. My mind rebelled against my instinct though, and I freed my hands and stood up and returned to pacing around the room.

I cleared my throat, "So how does this work? Who teaches this kid to open the gates of Heaven? And how long will that take?" I thought maybe talking about business would help distract me.

"As soon as the child is born it will be able to open the gates. It will not need to be taught. It will be instinct

"So what, it pops out and magically everything goes back to normal?"

"I'm not sure. This has never been attempted before."

"And it's not gonna turn around and eat me like a spider or anything, right?"

Castiel frowned thoughtfully and then decided, "No. It will not." I giggled a little at his serious demeanor. Of course, giggling just reminded me of how upset I was. I had never felt such a range of emotions in such a short time. The way he looked at me was so damn piercing, as if he saw parts of me that even I couldn't see. It was extremely frustrating and made me want to cover up. I couldn't imagine how soon he'd know me in a much more physical way than anyone else had. That thought made my mind jump to exactly what 'soon' meant. Did he plan on having me in the next room as soon as we finished our conversation? Just the thought made me panic and my heart race. I wasn't ready for that. I knew I wasn't ready for that. Suddenly tears filled my eyes again and I was crying before I could stop myself. I felt like such an idiot, and the way Cas was staring at me didn't help.

"So um… What's your plan here?" I asked somewhat more hostilely than intended, "Are you just gonna jump my bones after lunch and get it over with?" I really wished I could have sounded less insulted by the notion of it. I glanced hesitantly over at Cas, who did look a bit offended by how I'd put it. He stood up and closed the space between us.

With an air of perfect detached professionalism, he said, "If that's what you would like. We should not have to do it more than once." My bottom lip trembled, and I held back a sob. Cas cocked his head to the side slightly, seeming to be extremely confused as to why I was so upset. "That is not what you want." He finally decided. I shook my head, biting down on my lower lip hard. With an air of finality, he said, "You should take as much time as you need. In the mean time, I will look into fertility strategies. You should keep track of your menstrual cycle." And suddenly I was laughing again. Cas frowned trying to understand where the humor was. "That was not intended to be a joke, Margaret, there is a very specific time in a woman's cycle when she is most fertile and if we…"

"Thank you, Castiel, but I think I get the picture." He nodded.

"Well…" He cleared his throat, "I think I should go. Dean suggested I ask if I could kiss you… Would that be acceptable?" He seemed hesitant to ask at all, given that my eyes were still a little wet, but his intentions seemed warm. While no less intense, his whole face seemed to soften into an almost vulnerable place. I hesitated for a moment, and then took a step forward, until I could feel his breath. In answer to his question, I lifted up slightly off my heels and placed a small chaste kiss in the corner of his mouth. He responded by carefully and gently placing his hand over my cheek and moving into a full kiss. He seemed to want to deepen the kiss, but I stepped back, breaking away from him before he could.

"I'm going to go be by myself now." I breathed. Castiel nodded.

"Good bye, Margaret. I will see you soon." And with that he was gone.


	2. Chapter 2

I largely avoided Sam and Dean for the next few days, not entirely sure how to talk to them. I had shouted at Dean through my bedroom door than I'd go through with it but I wasn't happy about it and that I wasn't going to talk to him ever again. I couldn't remember being this emotional before I was a prophet. Maybe it came with the job. Of course I was going to talk to him again, he and Sam were the only friends I had and I cared about them both deeply, but I wasn't about to let them see me cry like I had with Cas.

I kept thinking about his hands holding mine and how safe I'd felt. Occasionally I wished I could have known him differently. Maybe we really could have been friends- or even more than that. Castiel _was_ extremely good looking and his eyes were absolutely paralyzing. I had a feeling that had I really gotten to know him under different circumstances, I would be completely head over heels for the guy. But that was out of the picture now. I did not like being forced to do things I didn't want to do and I didn't even really like talking about sex. And then I would have to raise a child! I'm sure Cas already had some ridiculous angel name all picked out. What was I supposed to tell my parents? I'm sure when I told them I was going away to be a prophet they didn't expect me to come back with their Nephilim grandchild. Was I supposed to put it through school? Did it need school? Did Castiel want to take an active role in it's life? From what he'd said earlier it sounded like he was at least protective over the idea of his child, and me for the matter. And what did he think about me? Did he expect me to marry him? Did angels get married? Did he want me to leave after the baby was born and never contact him again?

I really needed to get out of this room. Otherwise I was going to drive myself mad with all these questions. It had been three days and I had only left to run to the kitchen and bathroom and back. I was beginning to smell and cabin fever was setting in. Maybe it was time to give Sam and Dean some slack. They were clearly upset about the ordeal, and really I just needed to talk to someone. Being alone was fine for a while, but eventually I started to get antsy without someone to be with. I sighed and threw on a pair of jeans and a blouse and pulled myself out of bed and down the hall to the kitchen where I stopped behind the door. Castiel's voice was immensely recognizable.

"I'm not sure how to go about this." He said. I'd caught them in the middle of a conversation. I pressed my ear against the door, trying to hear without being caught eavesdropping.

"Well, Cas you could try being a little romantic." Sam suggested. "Make her dinner, bring her flowers."

"Yeah, girls love that crap. Just don't go too overboard." Dean warned. I wondered what he meant by that.

"What do you mean?" Cas asked.

"Don't make her think you have feelings for her if you don't. Kid's been through enough." I frowned at being called a kid, but my ears perked up to find out exactly how Castiel would respond.

"I don't want to hurt her." Castiel's voice was full of such compassion that it brought about a bit of a pause from the boys.

"Cas… You don't have feelings for her, right?"

I tried to lean even further into the door to hear but I must have pressed to hard because instead of hearing any kind of answer I hear Dean bark, "Maggie!" I cringed, knowing I was caught, "Are you eavesdropping?"

"No." I squeaked. The door opened up and the three of them were staring at me, looking rather disgruntled.

"Well look who finally left the Batcave." I sneered at Dean jokingly and then looked over at Castiel who was, once again a bright shade of red. I pitied him a little in his awkwardness and offered him a small smile. I was glad that I finally had my emotions under control enough to converse like a normal human being.

"I like peonies if that's any help." If it was possible, Cas grew even redder.

"Sorry, Maggie." Sam said. I rolled my eyes and smiled a little. I missed them. It meant a lot to be surrounded by people who actually wanted to make me happy.

"Not your fault. Um, I'm sorry for yelling at you guys." I said to all three of them.

"Don't worry about it." Dean said, putting his arm around me. "Cas here has something he wants to ask you." I looked up at Castiel who was now glaring daggers at Dean.

"What's that?" Cas swallowed hard and turned his attention back to me.

"Maggie, would you like to go on a date… with me…?" He stumbled through the sentence. I hesitated a little and I knew my face probably matched Cas's in shade. I wasn't sure I wanted that. Maybe it wasn't a good idea to bring any kind of feelings into this. Cas seemed to notice my hesitation and continued with, "We could leave the bunker. There is a restaurant not far from here that…" Before he could even finish his sentence Sam cut him off.

"Cas, that's not what we talked about!"

"There's no damn way she's leaving the…"

"Yes!" I exclaimed. "Yes, oh my gosh, yes let's go now. That sounds amazing." I was nearly jumping up and down at the notion of getting outside, even if it was on a date.

"No." Dean said in his 'end of conversation' voice, "That's not happening."

"I would make sure she remained safe and be with her at all times."

"Dean I will wear a _salt dress_. You have to let me go." I insisted.

"No." He said.

"I agree, Maggie, it's too dangerous."

"You guys leave the bunker all the damn time!"

"Sam and I know what we're doing."

"So does Cas!" I insisted. "Did you keep Kevin locked up too?"

"Yes!"

"And look what happened to him! I'm going insane in here, I haven't been outside in weeks. I am going to snap and go Jack Nicholson all over both of you." Dean rubbed his forehead, frustrated. I knew he felt responsible for what happened to Kevin. They both did, and it probably wasn't fair of me to bring it up, but if I had a chance to get outside for even a minute I was going to take it. Dean's lack of response made me think that maybe I had gotten through to him in some way. Castiel backed me up.

"We would not be gone for more than a few hours." Dean looked back and forth from me to Cas, glaring at both of us.

"Fine. You can come get her tonight at 8 and bring her back by 10. I swear, Cas if you're late…"

"We will not be late." Castiel said. He turned around to me and gave me a small smile. "I will bring peonies." And then he was gone again as if he'd never been there at all.

I was all giggles and dancing around the kitchen while making myself a sandwich. Dean was clearly still unhappy about the whole thing, but that was fine with me. If I could afford this emotional trauma, then so could he.

"You boys want anything?" I nearly sang.

"No." Dean grumbled. Sam was taking everything a little more lightly.

"Come on, Dean. Cas will take good care of her. It'll probably help for you two to get to know each other better, some place we can't spy on you." He shot Dean a look. I turned and stared at the two of them.

"Were you listening in on my conversation with Cas?" I gasped theatrically. "Well now you definitely owe me." I casually nibbled on my sandwich, then glanced up at Dean who was not laughing. "You okay?"

"Fine." He said. I frowned at him but didn't push the issue. "Look if Cas ever does or says anything that makes you uncomfortable…"

"Excuse me?" I interrupted, "Uncomfortable? Dean if I wasn't clear enough three days ago, this whole situation makes me _really_ uncomfortable. I am extremely uncomfortable. There's not much anyone could do or say to make it worse, except for you two treating me like a baby. You know what makes me uncomfortable? Hearing you two talk about me like a commodity. Cas has been the only one so far to be even remotely sensitive about this. I'm trying to figure out what I'm feeling right now and it really, really does not help for you to be giving him tips on how to pick me up." Okay, so maybe my emotions weren't completely under control yet, but everything I said was true. Still, I wasn't usually one for emotional outbursts with little to no provocation. Dean was quiet for a long time, then finally he just nodded and walked out of the room. I threw my hands out to the side in irritation then I shot Sam a glance to see if he had any explanation.

"Dean feels really bad." He started, "After Kevin… I think he just worries a lot." I sighed, a pang of guilt rushing through me. I should never have brought up Kevin. "He didn't even want to tell you about this Nephilim thing, he knew it would be too much to ask."

"Yeah. I mean - total honesty, it is too much to ask. But I trust you guys. If there was any other way you would have found it. I'm just kind of scared."

"Well, look there's no pressure to… um, get around to it right away. I mean, the sooner the better, but… Look, Maggie, I just… Dean and I both care about you a lot and we want to make this as easy as possible for you." I sighed and wrapped my arms around his giant frame. He returned the hug and rested his chin on my head. "We're always here for you if you need anything." I nodded into his chest. Eventually I pulled away from the hug and looked up at him and smiled a little.

"So are you gonna help me find something to wear or what? Because when I came here I didn't think I'd be wining and dining any angels." Sam smiled.

"I think I can find something."

It seemed an old friend of Sam and Dean's named Charlie, who was apparently a woman, was about my size and before she had ran off to the land of Oz with Dorothy, had left behind something of a wardrobe. Not much, but there was one dress that looked like it would suit a pre-required-baby-making/ first date. A little navy blue thing with a big red belt and white buttons. I threw it over a pair of tights and figured I was ready enough. I worried a little bit about looking like I was trying too hard to dress up for him. I really didn't know the protocol here. I'd been on plenty of dates before, but most of them were casual movie dates with high school sweethearts and I was fairly certain they were all human. Did angels have a specific 'courtship' ritual that I didn't know about? He had mentioned going to dinner. That sounded fairly standard. I decided that would be a good way to start some kind of a conversation with Dean after having yelled at him… again.

I caught him in the kitchen delving aggressively into a slice of pie I'd baked. There were over ten in the fridge. I didn't have a lot to do with my time, so I learned how to make pretty much every kind of pastry I could find a recipe for.

"That had better not be the last damn slice of chocolate." I warned, playfully. Dean looked up and acknowledged me silently before turning his attention back to his pie. I frowned. Clearly he wasn't in the mood to talk, but I was determined. I opened the fridge to see that it was in fact the last slice.

"It _is_, Asshat!" I exclaimed, pulling it away from him.

"Hey!" I held it just out of arms reach.

"We're gonna have a talk, Dean Winchester, and then you can have this back." Dean sat back in his chair and gave a gruff sigh.

"Now are you gonna be a whiney overprotective bitch about this situation, or are you gonna respect my decisions and be supportive?" I said, taking a bite of the remaining pie. Dean cocked his head to the side and pursed his lips.

"Probably the first one." He said, taking a grab at the plate. I tried not to giggle, but I was glad that I had at least gotten him talking.

"Wrong answer." I said taking another bite.

"Whatever, it wasn't that good anyway. And you look dumb, by the way." I gasped dramatically and shoved him.

"I look hot."

"Sure, Kiddo." I smiled a little and he returned it. "You gonna be safe tonight?"

"Yes, Mom." Dean rolled his eyes. "Cas is coming to get me in an hour, anything I should know?"

"Like what?" He said, taking the opportunity to grab what was left of the pie back and shove the last bite in his mouth. He smiled smugly at his victory.

"Like did he say anything to you?"

"About you?"

"No, about the weather." Dean folded the paper plate into a ball and threw it into the trashcan across the room.

"Not much. He's clearly as freaked as you are though. Uh, he said he liked your hair."

"My _hair?_" My hair was a mess. It was corse and dark and a ball of frizz half the time and tangled and all over the place the rest of the time. I had long ago decided that my best option was to keep it in a pony tail or braid always.

"Yeah. He got all flustered after that and didn't want to talk anymore. He's a weird guy, Maggie, but I think he cares about you. Not sure why." I shoved Dean playfully and rolled my eyes. But his comment about Castiel caring about me made me relax a little more. I hadn't ever really been afraid of him- I was sure he wouldn't hurt me- but he was more than a little intimidating, and after everything that the boys had told me, I had been a bit suspicious of his intentions with our child. _Our child_. The words were still enough to make you want to throw up, whether or not Cas supposedly cared about me.

"I don't know what to take from that. Dammit, Dean I don't even know what I'm supposed to do tonight." Dean scratched his head thoughtfully.

"I'd probably just get really drunk and get it over with."

"I'm nineteen, no one'll sell me a drink. Plus, do you really think Castiel, Angel of the Lord would take advantage of a drunk girl?" Dean shrugged as if to say 'probably not'.

"So, what? Do I flirt with him? Do I…?" Dean let out a harsh laugh.

"_Don't_ flirt with him unless you fully intend on filming it and letting me watch. I've seen you try to flirt and while _I _personally thought it was damn near the most convincing display I've ever seen, I'm not sure Cas is ready for it." Suddenly Sam came walking casually through the door, having caught the last bit of our conversation and interrupting with a mimic of my voice,

"_Excuse me, you have a really wonderful nose, do you mind if I take a picture of it?"_

"That wasn't flirting! That was for a school project." I shouted defensively, but it went unheeded. That had been the first time Sam and Dean met me- I was putting together a portfolio for a photography class- and they had never let me live it down.

"Cas would let her, too." Dean said putting on a fake Castiel voice, "If this is what it takes to ease the transition into our fornicating…" Sam snorted and even I laughed a little at his near spot on immitation.

"I do not sound like that." Castiel's raspy voice appeared out of nowhere in the kitchen behind us. I nearly screamed and jumped around, suddenly extremely embarrassed. Cas was wearing the same suit, tie, and trench coat as always, but he held an almost comically large bouquet of peonies. Dean cleared his throat, awkwardly.

"No. 'Course you don't, Cas."

Castiel ignored him and approached me with and expression that could only be described as immensely professional.

"I brought you these." He said handing me the peonies. All the joking with Sam and Dean that had made me feel so much better might as well have never happened. As soon as Cas walked in the room everything was all nerves and business. The bouquet was so enormous that it nearly covered my face.

"Wow, Cas, thank you. I think I'll leave these here." There weren't any vases in the bunker so I just handed them off to Sam to find a place for them.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked. I just nodded. Cas held out his arm, and I took it in mine, feeling much too formal for my liking, but also somehow more comfortable than I had been in a long time. He felt a bit like a security blanket.

"You two crazy kids be safe." Dean chimed in with a smirk. We both glared at him before vanishing from the kitchen.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N- Thanks for the lovely reviews you guys! I really appreciate them. This one is a bit shorter, because I've been crazy busy this week. Next one will be longer! **

Cas and I appeared in an empty ally behind the restaurant where no one could see us pop out of thin air. I'd somehow expected teleporting to be more of a rush but it was really more like blinking than anything else. I closed my eyes and when I opened them I was somewhere entirely different. I hadn't felt a thing. However, I realized that I'd been squeezing Castiel's arm with all my strength. He didn't comment or seem even remotely bothered by it. I cautiously unlatched my arm from his and took in my first breath of fresh air in weeks. It was exhilarating. I had always loved the outdoors, but never in my life had I been so grateful for it.

With a giant, dopey grin on my face I looked up at Cas and said, "Thank you so much, Cas. I've been dying to get out of that place."

"We can't stay long…" Cas said looking over his shoulder, "But you're welcome."

After that short exchange ended my gaze shifted from Castiel's face to the space between my feet. The tension in the air was near tangible.

"Um I…"

"Would you like to…" We both started at the same time and then stopped, recognizing that we were talking over each other. Finally Cas broke the silence and finished with, "Would you like to go in?"

"Sure." I said, trying to smile through the awkwardness. As amazing as it was to be out, the fact that I was on a date with the person that I need to sleep with "soon" in order to stop Armageddon was not exactly relaxing.

My stomach did so many loops while we were being seated that by the time we sat down I wanted to throw up. At least Castiel had requested that we sit outside. It was a really sweet restaurant. Little purple and yellow potted flowers sat on every table and Christmas lights flickered around the walls. I wondered if Dean would consider this "overdoing it"- not that he ever had to do much to get into a girl's pants.

Immediately I made a grab for the menu and held it up in front of my face. Cas followed suit and for a long while we were both totally silent. When I began to collapse inwardly from the uncomfortable quiet, I put the menu down and asked, maybe a little too loudly, "What are you going to get?" Castiel stared at me for a moment and I realized I must have nearly shouted it at him. I squirmed under his gaze until finally he said,

"Since I consumed Theo's grace, I have had no need for food. But while I was human I found spaghetti and meatballs to be… satisfactory." A certain scene in a certain Disney film popped into my head, but I pushed aside the reference I was about to make, sure that it would go over the angel's head

"Spaghetti and meatballs sounds good. I think I'll get that too." I said, setting down my menu. I thought about asking him to 'tell me about himself', but I could only imagine the all too truthful and depressing answer he would give me. Besides, playing at 'first date' would feel like lying. Aside from the restaurant, the lights, and the flowers, there wasn't much that was really romantic about our situation. I decided that whatever the results were, the direct approach was probably best.

"So… Um, Cas… Not that I don't appreciate it… Because I really do… But… What _exactly_ were you hoping to get out of…" I gestured at the table and restaurant, "this?" Castiel looked perfectly prepared to sell his soul in order to get out of answering that question. His expression alone let me know that the answer was something along the lines of 'baby making'.

"I had hoped that we could… get to know each other. You could… um… tell me about some of your… interests." Every word was so strained and uncomfortable that it was almost cute. He was struggling just as much as I was, and that was comforting in a way. I briefly wondered how this awkward and innocent creature could be the same person that killed hundreds of angels and humans in a mad grasp for divinity. Sam and Dean had told me all about it when I first met them, as a part of what could have easily been a powerpoint presentation on all things supernatural and totally nuts-o. They'd insisted that he was a changed man and I was starting to believe them.

"Well, I like art." I said, fiddling with the straw in my water. "I was going to art school before… all this."

"I have always thought the human ability to create art was one of your most redeeming qualities." Cas said.

"Yeah… Me too." I cleared my throat, "I actually, uh, I actually think about that a lot. Why we make art, you know? Like, I feel like a lot of people are generally afraid of any kind of emotional release, but they… they need it, so they sort of live through the catharsis that comes through the art. And, uh, that's why it's so important that artists remain honest, because it's a responsibility to people who can't be." I was blushing so brightly by the end of that little speech that I almost reached for the menu to cover my face. My thoughts about art were very close to my heart, and I always struggled with putting them into words. It never came out the way I wanted to. But before I could retract any of it, I glanced at Cas across the table scrunching up his forehead and staring thoughtfully at the table.

"Yes. I think that if angels had been given artistic ability things would be very… different. We would be less… cold."

"I don't think you're cold." The words came spilling out before I could stop them "You've been nothing but supportive and kind to me this whole time and whatever I say to the contrary later, I really appreciate it."

"I'm glad that I could make this easier for have been a comforting presence for me as well." I let an extremely loud and unattractive snort.

"Yeah, I'm sure I was _very_ comforting. Shouting at you and then disappearing into my room for three days."

"I believe your emotionality has been… cathartic for me." He said, using my word, "I am not happy that you were upset, but it was, like you said, a release for you to say what I was feeling."

"Ha!" I exclaimed with a grin and a pointed finger across the table, "So you are just as freaked about this as I am!"

"I'll admit that I haven't given much thought to being a father since…" He paused, amending his train of thought, "At one point, I wanted very much to be a father figure, but that ended up being… very wrong." The look of deep regret that passed over Castiel's face made me want to wrap him in a hug and tell him it was going to be okay, and that he was forgiven, but it didn't seem like my place to do anything like that. Regardless of the game we were playing, I didn't know the angel very well.

"If it's any consolation, I think you'll be a great father." Cas furrowed his brow, clearly thinking that I was lying to make him feel better. "Really. Our super-powered, world saving, Nephilim baby will be lucky to have you."

"Thank you, Margaret."

"Oh and that's another thing. You can call me Maggie. I've never liked Margaret- sounds like an old lady." I said trying to lighten the mood. Cas nodded in acceptance. "So, Cas, what are some of your interests?" Repeating his question from earlier.

"I mostly enjoy watching people."

"Oh yeah, I guess that's kind of in the whole angel job description, huh?"

"Yes. I never thought I would have to experience what it was to be human, and for a long time I was fascinated by your needs and desires. I didn't understand the necessity of forming bonds with one another. Dean was the first individual with whom I felt any profound connection. I enjoy watching over him." I smiled a little. It was extremely evident how close the two of them were. I imagined that if I had spent all of eternity without bonding with anyone, the first person I made a connection with would be very special too. Still, I could only imagine how Dean would feel about Cas 'watching over him' when he didn't know it. I decided that when I was undoubtably forced to recount the whole evening to the two of them, I would leave out that particular detail.

Around that time our waiter took our orders and interrupted the already somewhat forced conversation. Castiel clearly did not know how to progress in any way from here. He looked a little like a child being forced to interact with his scary great aunt. I decided that if anyone was going to make this date not dissolve into tears and one long awkward silence, it was going to be me.

"So, should we jump right to the good stuff and talk about baby names? A college fund? Retirement plan?" Cas swallowed hard, not picking up on the lightness in my tone.

"I… I will not age, so I will not retire and by the time you are of an old age, ideally I will have restored my grace and be able to provide for you without a 'plan'." I didn't miss the fact that he'd just promised to take care of me all my life, but I didn't want to delve into it. I jutted out my chin and nodded with mock thoughtfulness.

"Good to know." Cas tilted his head slightly, as if he thought he might be picking up on the joke.

"However, when it comes to baby names, many human cultures have a tradition of naming sons after their fathers or grandfathers. Castiel or God Junior for example." I coughed loudly, nearly choking on the water I was sipping on. He couldn't be serious. Cas's eyes widened, "It was a joke. I do not think such names would be very inconspicuous among humans." I smiled at his explanation and said with what I hoped was clearly a joking manner,

"No, I think God Junior is perfect for a boy. We can call him YHWHJR for short. Of course if it's a girl, we'll name her after my mother, Gertrude."

"If you are especially fertile, we could be lucky enough to use both." At that I erupted into a fit of laughter, and even Cas gave the first genuine sounding laugh I'd ever heard from him. He had a truly beautiful smile.

"Is that flirting, Castiel?" I chided.

"It is customary." I giggled. If I hadn't been paying attention I would have missed it, but in that moment I noticed how Cas's face lit up when I laughed, and it only made me turn a bright shade of pink.

We joked and laughed in that manner until our food came, which we ate heatedly. Any amount of time could have gone by and I wouldn't have noticed. Somehow something had clicked between us, and all awkwardness was gone. Cas still made overly innocent or inappropriate comments occasionally, but I found him more and more hilarious as the night wore on. In between mouthfuls, I filled Cas in on what art I loved, my frustrations with feeling like I couldn't do anything to help the Winchesters, and ultimately we got around to my family.

"Well, my parents own a plumbing company." I said.

"So, that is where the smell comes from." Cas teased cautiously, looking like a four year old who had stolen a cookie and was checking to see if his parents would find it funny or naughty. Still, I had never seen him so playful, and it made me want to burst out of my skin to know that I'd had such an affect on him. I gasped and jokingly slapped him across the table.

"Shut your stupid face." I said smiling, "At least I own more than one outfit." Castiel's energy shifted suddenly. He narrowed his eyes, giving me the most threatening stare I'd ever seen from him.

"You will regret that comment, girl." He growled. My breath hitched in my throat, thinking I had offended him, but also suddenly aware that there was something inexplicably sexy about him in that moment. Almost immediately, he broke out in a toothy, childlike grin and I realized that he'd been playing with me.

"You jerk!" I exclaimed, laughing. "You friggin' scared me."

"I apologize." He said, still smiling from ear to ear, "You were telling me about your family."

"Yeah, well now I don't want to talk to you at all." I said, with an overdramatic pout.

"I will make it up to you."

"You'd better."

"Actually… I have an idea." Castiel placed some money on the table and reached his hand to me from across the table. I took it, cautiously, and within another blink of an eye the restaurant was gone.


	4. Chapter 4

When I opened my eyes I was staring directly at Cas, who was smiling nervously back at me. I broke eye contact with him and looked out to my left and realized with a start that I was standing on a roof top overlooking an enormous city, a city that I recognized instantly. It didn't take a second glance for me to realize that Cas had taken me to Venice, Italy. I felt my eyes widen and my jaw drop against my will. I snapped my head back and forth from Cas's face to the cityscape in front of me. It must have been at least seven hours later here, because I could see a hint of the sun starting to rise in the distance.

"C… Castiel…" I started, but I couldn't think of a thing to say that could express what I was thinking, much less feeling.

"Venice is one of the most commonly painted cities in the world. Ivan Aivazovsky often painted here. You did… You did say that you like his work." It struck me then just how much Cas had been hanging on my every word when we had spoken. I was used to speaking arbitrarily, expecting no one to really be listening. I was hit with the distinct notion that Castiel might just remember ever word I'd ever said to him. I winced as I felt my face turn a bright shade of pink.

"I don't know what to say." I mumbled, completely awestruck by both the site and the man standing across from me. "Th… Thank you."

"Am I forgiven?"

"Wh… What?" Then I remembered his joke from the restaurant, and giggled "Oh, yes. Castiel, I think this more than makes up for it."

"Good."

I sat down on the edge of the building we were on top of and allowed my legs to hang over the edge. Castiel joined me, but didn't say anything. However I could feel that his eyes were on me. I didn't have any words left, and neither, it seemed, did he, and so we sat in silence watching the sun come up over the city. I forgot entirely my situation that had only a few hours ago seemed so terrible. I felt utterly at peace for the first time in a long time. After a while, I dared a glance in Cas's direction and caught him just as entranced by the site as I was. It was incredible to think that after so many centuries, Cas was still intoxicated with the world. It didn't take long for him to catch me staring at him, however, and he turned to meet my eyes.

I found myself exploring his face. I knew that Jimmy something was the real owner of the face, and I wondered how much it had changed over the time it had been possessed by Castiel. There was a wrinkle between his eyebrows that could have been formed by years of drawing his brows together in thoughtfulness as he so often did. His lips were slightly chapped, there was a hint of stubble around his mouth, and his hole head was characteristically cocked to the side. I thought it might be entirely possible to paint Castiel and the man that was his vessel as entirely different men.

That thought was a relief, as my whole damn mind was suddenly brimming with images of him ravishing me right there on the rooftop. Our clothes were discarded somewhere in the city streets far below and there was nothing left between our bodies. I imagined his rough lips pressing against my jaw, followed by teeth, leaving marks up and down my neck before moving lower…

"Maggie." Castiel's low rumbling voice brought me back to reality.

"Hm?"

"We should return. Dean said ten o clock." Immediately the fantasy was kicked out of my head and my sense of pride returned. As soon as Dean's name was spoken, I remembered exactly who it was that was pimping me out in the first place. I remembered that whatever it seemed like, this was all a game that we were playing until I was comfortable enough to let him put a baby in me. The only difference now was that I might have wanted him to.

"Do we have to?" I whined playfully.

"Yes. Dean was right when he said it was dangerous for you to be outside the bunker too long."

"But you'd never let anything happen to me, right?" I said with a smile. Castiel just stared at me and said,

"Never." That sounded an awful lot like a promise to me. My parents had promised to always protect me, so did Sam and Dean. A lot of people made that promise, but it had always seemed so immaterial until now. When Cas said he would never let anything happen to me, it sounded so much like "I love you" that I could have cried. Especially, considering that I was beginning to think that I felt it back.

I wanted to kiss him, I wanted to throw my arms around his neck and run my fingers through his hair. I wanted him to pull me in close to him and force his tongue into my mouth, and then I wanted him to hold my hand and walk through the city with me. It didn't seem to matter whether we were having sex, or just holding each other, I wanted him, and not just until I got pregnant.

That was the thought that brought me down. Presumably, as soon as I was with child, Cas's job was done. He could leave and only show up now and again as a 'friend of the Winchesters'. If he did want a relationship with the child, it would most likely be completely devoid of me.

"You're right. We should go." I said, a bit more harshly than I intended, standing up and waiting for him to follow. He seemed a bit struck by my sudden change in tone, but followed my lead. Instead of taking my hand like he had before, he placed his hand on my completely clothed upper arm.

In an instant we were back in the bunker, Sam and Dean were talking loudly in the kitchen, and without sparing Cass a last look I marched in. Dean spun around and shot me one of the angriest looks I'd ever seen from him.

"Do you know what time it is? You're over half an hour late. I said ten o clock. How fucking difficult is it for people to follow orders around here? My dad would have beat my ass if I'd ever even thought about pulling this shit."

"Are you gonna "beat my ass", Dean?" I said trying to sound as bored and unimpressed as possible.

"No, Maggie, but…"

"Then goodnight." I said walking past him. I turned around quickly, and forced a small sad smile at Cas and added, "Good night, Cas, thank you for everything." With that I was down the hall and into my bedroom. Even from there though, I could hear Dean tearing into Cas and then Sam. I curled my knees up to my chest and rested my head in my hands.

Everything was so much more confusing now, and I suddenly felt very old and very tired.

—

The next morning I woke up to a knocking on my door.

"Hey, Kiddo, breakfast." Sam's warmer voice was a welcome distraction from Dean's shouting. Still I considered not answering him. I half expected Dean to be standing next to him waiting to rip me a new one. Still, the rumbling sound coming from my stomach overruled that instinct. I glanced at my clock, wondering why I was so hungry, and saw that it was 11:30. I had slept all morning. I rarely slept later than eight o clock even before I met Sam and Dean. I guess traveling across oceans in the blink of an eye took something out of a girl.

I rolled out of bed, deciding to risk it. Besides, I could smell pancakes and maple syrup wafting from the kitchen. I didn't bother to change out of my pajamas- not for Sam, and certainly not for Dean after how he'd yelled at me last night. I didn't respond well to being yelled at and I didn't intend on giving him the satisfaction of thinking he affected me in any way. Luckily, it was just Sam standing on the other side of the door.

"I wanted to let you sleep, but the pancakes were getting cold."

"Thanks." I said, wiping the sleep out of my eyes. I followed Sam into the kitchen and sat down as he served up two plates.

"Dean… Um, went to a motel last night." I rolled my eyes. He could be so dramatic, but I couldn't help but feel a pang of guilt at having made him that upset.

"He's a drama queen." Was all I said, digging into at my breakfast.

"Yeah well, he was just worried about you. You know, after…"  
"Yeah I know, after Kevin." I said, allowing a little more empathy to leak into my tone. "I don't like being yelled at. I don't accept it as a valid form of communication, and I won't respond to it." I paused to take a big mouth full of pancake. "So Dean can go fuck himself." Sam chuckled a little.

"Well, on a lighter note, how was your date with Cas?" I swallowed hard.

"Fine."Sam gave me a look that said he was not going to accept such a short answer. "Very fine."

"Okay, fine, if you don't want to tell me you don't have to." I sighed.

"It was really, really nice. It was beyond really, really nice, Sam. He took me to friggin' Italy."

"Woah. That is… really, really nice."

"Yeah and then I started having… _feelings_… and now I don't know what to do." Sam's eyes widened a little and he nodded slowly.

"Well, I mean, not to be insensitive, Maggie, but isn't that kind of, um… convenient? I mean, considering…"

"No. It's extremely inconvenient." I cut him off, "Because now I'm stuck being the one person in the hook up that wants it to be more than a hook up, Sam, and that is not fun."

"Oh… Well, you never know, Cas might feel the same way. He left pretty quickly last night, but he seemed almost… drunk. Even when Dean was yelling at him, he didn't seem to hear any of it." I put my fork down so I could once again cover my face in my hands.

"I just don't want to do this, Sam. I want to go back to my life. I'm just exhausted."

"I know. I'm sorry." It was really all he could say. It was all anyone could say, and it helped a little, but not much. I was about to thank him when the door swung open and slammed shut. Dean stomped into the kitchen, took one look at me, one look at Sam, and one final look at the pile of pancakes. Silence hung over the room as I waited for him to explode. Instead, he pulled out a chair next to me, aggressively slammed a plate down in front of him and piled the rest of the pancakes onto it.

"So you gonna spill, or what?" He finally said, mouth still full of food.

"Huh?"

"You put a damn spell on that angel. I've never seen his feathers so ruffled." The relief of knowing that Dean had apparently moved on made me giggle. He smirked at me and I knew I was forgiven. I figured I could get around to forgiving him too.

I spent the next few hours telling Sam and Dean everything, enduring their teasing, crude jokes, and laughter until I came to the end.

"I told him not to go overboard, and he takes her to Italy. You ever taken a girl to Italy, Sammy?"

"I have not, Dean."

"Me neither, but I'm pretty sure that if I had, I would've gotten laid. So, here's a question- why didn't Cas?" I rolled my eyes.

"I told you. I got… _feelings_." Dean grimaced dramatically.

"There a cure for that?" I punched him in the arm and he laughed, "Look all I'm saying is that, whatever feelings you've got, Cas has got 'em worse. You didn't see his face after you left last night. He looked like he'd been thrown out of Heaven all over again."

"That's nice of you to say, but you can't know that for sure, and if I say anything it'll make everything 20 bazillion times more awkward than they already are."

"Okay." Dean said standing up and walking over to the kitchen to pull out a slice of my pie, "Fine, do what you want. But take it from someone who knows, fucking is a hell of a lot more fun with… _feelings._" He said mockingly.

"Yeah, I'm sure." I muttered under my breath. Dean caught that, and spun around.

"Maggie… Are you a…?"

"_No!" _Dean's jaw dropped to the floor and he stared at me. "Shit." I said, dropping my face to the table.

"I don't believe it. Maggie, you of all people…"

"What's that supposed to mean?" I snapped.

"Nothing… Just you're, ya know…"

"What am I?"

"Kind of a horn dog?" Dean said. Sam and Dean both started laughing. I shot them what I hoped was an incredibly piercing glare.

"I am _not!_"

"Come on, Mags, when are you not staring at my ass?"

"I will murder you."

"And you'd think a girl your age would know how to clear her internet history."

"Seriously, I hope you enjoy your last day on earth." Sam was laughing away across the table from me, and I couldn't help joining in.

"Especially when she's borrowing _my _laptop." Sam chimed in. I snorted, and threw a handful of pancake crumbs at him.

"Fine. From now on, I will play out said pornos live with Cas so both of you can hear. The really kinky ones too. Either of you have any spare rope we could use?" Dean made a loud barfing sound and we both laughed hystericly, but I noticed that Sam had gone quiet. I was about to ask if he was okay, but was stopped by a cough from behind me.

Castiel was standing behind my chair, beat red and shuffling from foot to foot. I must have killed babies in a past life.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Sorry again for this one being a bit shorter. Also be aware of a bit of mood whiplash ahead! Thank you all again for all of the lovely reviews. I am so, so happy and flattered that you are enjoying this story! 3

"How long have you been standing there?" I demanded. Cas stared at Dean and Sam as if begging for help. He cleared his throat, and stared at the ground.

"Spare rope." I groaned and slammed my head down onto the table. "It's nothing to be embarrassed about, Maggie, bondage is not an uncommon sexual fantasy among humans. If it would make you happy, I would be glad to…"

"Wow. Wow. Um. Wow. Let's just…. Sam, Dean, would you mind getting as far away from me as possible?" Both of them had long since given up trying to hide their laughter and while it was clear that Dean was dying to make some "witty" comment, he couldn't manage it. So the two of them just nodded and disappeared into the next room. When the door closed behind them, their laughter only got louder.

"It's a big bunker, you can_ definitely_ do better than that!" I called after them. They kept walking until their laughter was nearly inaudible. I hesitantly turned to face Cas, who was still beat red and shuffling from foot to foot. "I'm sorry Cas, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. We were just joking around."

"I am not uncomfortable." Cas said, clearly trying to sound as confident as possible. "I came by because I did not have the opportunity last night to tell you that I found our date to be one of the most enjoyable nights I've had in… a very long time." He swallowed hard, "I was wondering if you would agree to another."

He looked so nervous that he might shake out of his skin. Well, he was either nervous or he was lying, and he really had a just _horrible_ time the other night and only wanted to take me out again in order to get this whole thing over with. _I really should just do the decent thing and get it over with now so he doesn't have to endure this torture anymore. _I could have kicked myself for feeling so insecure. My "dark" phase had ended in high school, and I was now a grown woman who really couldn't go around acting like the world had dealt me an unfair hand. Had Cas been anyone else in the world, I would have accepted his offer immediately. So why was it so hard to do now?

"You know, I don't really think that Dean is going to be okay with us leaving the bunker again." Was all that I could manage.

"I didn't expect that he would. I thought we could spend the day together here. Unless you have plans for the day." I laughed a little at that.

"It's been a long time since I've had plans."

"I would like to make plans with you… for several days." Cas said, not missing a beat. I blushed and paused, weighing my options. I didn't know what to say. Of course, I wanted to spend more time with him, but I had no way of knowing what his real intentions were. I told myself I was being dramatic, and that it didn't really matter in the long run. The sooner he put a baby in me, the sooner I would know if that was all he wanted. Better to get it over with quickly, right?

"Cas…"

"Maggie." Dean's voice cut into our conversation. I turned around and glared daggers in his direction but my face fell as soon as I saw his expression. He and Sam had lost all sense of joviality now, and I felt my heart lurch up into my mouth. I clenched my fists together, knowing instinctively that something had happened. "Maggie, I just got a call from Bobby."

"What happened?" It was more of a command than a question.

"He just heard from some of the hunters we have around your family. They can't find them." I felt my knees give out from under me but I didn't hit the ground. Cas had caught me and was holding me up. My breath came out in pants and quickly turned into sobs. I instinctively turned around and buried my face in Cas's chest. My mom, my dad, my baby brother- they could all be dead. I may never see them again. _I knew this was going to happen! I should have never trusted them! I should never have left them! _They didn't deserve this. They should never have been affected by this. 

"No, no, no…" My words were swallowed up by Cas' coat, "No, you promised!" I suddenly shrieked, spinning back around towards the two of them. "You promised they'd be safe! You promised!"

"We're going to find them, Maggie." Dean said, clenching his jaw.

"No, fuck you. Fuck both of you. Fuck your promises. I'm going to find them. Come on, Cas." I grabbed his arm and attempted to pull him towards the door, but damn, Cas was a rock. He didn't budge, which made me feel absolutely ridiculous. I must have looked like a lunatic with hysterical tears streaming down my face desperately pulling on the angel's arm, but I didn't care. Sam and Dean had sworn that nothing would happen to my family if I came with them. Why on earth should I trust them to bring them back to me? "Cas, _come on!_"

"Maggie, try to calm down." Sam started. "Look, Dean and I already have a plan. If you want to help you can…" I cut him off with the most outrageously horrible sound I could muster, as I stormed across the room to punch him in the chest.

_"You… Swore… You'd… Keep… Them… Safe!" _I emphasized each word with a punch to his chest.

Sam didn't respond. Instead he just wrapped his enormous arms around me and held me as still as possible. I finally stopped hitting him and just stood there and let him hold onto me. When I finally got a hold of myself enough to form real thoughts, I pulled away, and wrapped my own arms around myself. My eyes and nose were still dripping, and I was still shaking a little, but I was able to stand on my own.

"If I have this baby, that'll end all this." I said quietly. "That'll get them back… Keep them safe." I didn't want to add 'if they're not already dead', but I was thinking it. Sam just nodded, clearly thinking the same thing. I sniffled loudly and shook my head, trying to pull a strong and sure face. "'Kay. Come on, Cas."

Cas, who had been staring at the ground this whole time, snapped his head up in my direction, his eyes wide. He glanced back and forth between Sam and Dean, but didn't find any help there. He turned his attention back to me, looking more than a little panicked.

"Maggie… Are you sure you're…?"

"We'll let you guys talk." Sam said, gesturing to Dean to leave the room, but Dean stormed right past him and placed a heavy hand on my shoulder.

"I'm really sorry, Kiddo." I just nodded and tried not to glare at him, knowing that if I spoke I'd only end up bawling again. With that, Dean followed his brother out the room, closing the door behind them.

I turned around to try and meet Cas' eye but he was looking off somewhere else. I wasn't sure exactly what to do from that point. I had sort of hoped that he would take the lead, but clearly that wasn't going to happen. I thought of my baby brother being pulled apart by some black eyed bastard and with fierce determination wrapped my fist around Cas' backwards tie and pulled him in to my chest. I pressed my lips to his furiously, but he seemed reluctant to make any motion back towards me. I realized that it must be because there were tears falling from my eyes again.

Deciding to force the issue, I took his hand and pulled him across the hall into my bedroom. He followed hesitantly, and closed the door behind us, which I took as encouragement. I slipped out of my shoes and kicked them into the corner. More cautiously this time, I ran my fingers through the angel's dark hair and kissed him again.

"Maggie…" Cas pulled away from my lips, placing his hands firmly on my shoulders. His voice was nearly inaudible, "I can not have intercourse with you while you are crying."

"I… I… I'm sorry… I…" I tried to wipe the tears out of my eyes and pull him in for another kiss, but he wouldn't move. "Cas, _we have to_."

"Not this very moment." I let out a frustrated noise, but I wasn't going to give up that easily.

"Tell me what you want, Castiel." I murmured in the most seductive voice I could manage, whispering his name like a prayer in his ear. The hitch in his breath was enough to spur me on. "I've never done this before. You're going to have to walk me through it." I figured there was at least a 50/50 chance he was into the idea of my being a virgin, his being an angel and all. When he remained a complete statue, I held my breath and ran my hands down his chest until I reached the edge of his pants. "I think I know where to start, though."

In a flash, Cas caught my hands in his. He placed two light kisses to each of my wrists before releasing them and wrapping his arms around me.

"Wh… What are you doing?" I mumbled.

"I wish to express my sympathy." He said. "I worry about my family, as well." I wanted to fight him, and tell him that if he really cared he would go through with this, because that was the only thing that was going to fix any of this. But instead, I couldn't help but melt into his embrace. Together we sat down on the edge of the bed and I rested my forehead on his shoulder.

"The last thing I said to my brother was that he was going to be safe and that I would never let anything happen to him." Cas was silent for a moment.

"I have heard Dean and Sam promise that to one another very often. Even if it is not true, I believe that they find both it comforting." I nodded.

Slowly, I felt Cas shift behind me slightly. I looked up at him but instead of merely his arm around my back, there were two enormous pitch black wings wrapped around me. They were magnificent- unlike anything I'd ever imagined. A sense of warmth filled my body, and I snuggled closer to Cas. I wondered just how many people Cas had revealed this part of himself to. I knew that Sam and Dean had never seen his wings.

"I want to comfort you." Cas murmured, sounding almost embarrassed by the notion of such a thing. Those five words had me in tears again, but for a different reason. These tears were warm and innocent. We lowered our bodies back onto the bed, so we were lying next to one another, entangled in arms and wings. I had never in my life felt so close to anyone. His wings kept me pressed tightly to his body, and his chin was positioned so it could rest directly on my head. I crooked my neck, and placed a chaste kiss on his jaw, this time appreciating the feeling of his stubble on my lips. He let out a contended noise, and I let my eyes fall closed. This didn't fix anything and it didn't make me any less worried about my family. In fact, it was probably a waste of time, but I felt certain as I drifted off to sleep that I would never need to worry about being alone again.


End file.
